Surely the very point that is being debated is the reason why we are not all the same, we are individuals, what is right for one is not right for all.

I do agree that the law and timescale surrounding abortion needs tightening. But if abortion is made illegal we go back to women dying, being shunned for making the wrong choice, where does it end?

I felt that I was being mature and taking responsibility for my actions, rather than bringing a child into the world that on doctors advice would only have known suffering and may not have known much of life.  There are many different reasons for a decision but most women do not take this decision lightly.  I agree not all women see the seriousness of the situation but for those few they may not see the seriousness in any area of their life. 

But it is still an individuals right to choose, that being the emphasis of pro-choice. Not pushing someone to end a pregnancy because they do not fit a correct set of points - partner, house, etc. This returns us to single mothers homes, forced marriage and similar situations, which do no good for mother or child. 
Or making someone keep a baby that may not want to or be able to care for them, not everyone is as mature or brave as the woman you know lakato.
There are many different types of maturity and responsibility. Otherwise we would all be carbon copies.

Hi Sarie,

Thank you for sharing your story with us and obviously this is a very emotive topic for you…

My comments are in reference to a post made by Maysmum that young people who have an abortion are demonstrating maturity and responsibility - I think this does undermine young people who choose to keep the baby even though it is hard work for them - this requires much more maturity and responsibility than deciding to have an abortion. You said yourself that you would have kept the pregnancy which shows that you were mature and and responsible enough to face up to the fact that you were pregnant even though the situation for you was not ideal - abortion was not your first choice. The same applied for my friend and for several other young women out there!  Abortion is used as the 'way out' in so many situations so I think that saying that choosing an abortion shows the same level of maturity is almost an insult to them.  They could have taken that option but they completely changed their lives instead. The people that choose to have an abortion can pretty much carry on with their lives the same as before (although some people may strugle with their decision). You may argue that different people have different levels of maturity and responsibility but if someone isn;t able to cope with the responsibility of the consequnces of having sex then they shouldn;t be having sex in the first place. I don;t think a life should be taken as a result.

I don't think abortion will ever be made illegal but I really hope that that the limit is reduced significantly.  It horrifies me to even look at a picture of a 20 week old baby and think that that life could be destroyed.  If women want the choice not to have a baby then they should choose not to have sex…

In what situation would you consider that an abortion is a mature and responsible decision?  I think that people who are able to adapt and accommodate a baby into their lives even when it was not ideal do show maturity and responsibility

People that wouldn't be able to adapt and accommodate a baby for a starters.  I think someone recognising their situation and making the best of it are being responsible and mature.  Clearly having a child and becoming a parent is not going to be the mature and responsible decision for everybody.

There is an interesting chapter in a book called 'Freakonomics' on how about 18-20 years after abortion became legal in America there was a drastic reduction in crime rates.  The authors argued that because young women who would have become entrenched in poverty and disenfranchised from society had another option and took it a whole generation of young criminals were not born.  The murder rate reduced drastically.  It was very interesting.

But there are so many situations where I would struggle to believe anyone would be against abortion (rape victims, child rape victims, incest victims etc etc).

If women want the choice not to have a baby then they should choose not to have sex…

Yes, but this just isn't realistic is it.  I had my first baby at 18 and my fourth at 29.  I now have a hormonal IUD fitted which is more effective contraception than sterilisation, but not 100%.  I have ahead of me probably 15 but more near 20 years when i do not want to be having a baby.  If I fell pregnant in 15 years time when all my children were grown up I would be devestated.  So, what should I do?  Tell my husband we are not having sex for 20 years then see our relationship deteriorate and fall apart and my children lose a loving family home?  It's not just young teenagers who have abortions.  It is also getting more common among 40 somethings who have got pregnant by accident when their children have grown up.

In fact, 1 in 3 women under 45 have had an abortion now so although 2 or 3 on this site have said they have, more than likely a significant number more have and do not want to say.

Becky
x