I suppose it depends what you class as a ‘good’ education.
I think that university degrees are now over-rated, and unless you specifically want a career in something that requires one, I wouldn’t bother personally.
However, for my own children, I’d want them to do A-levels, but then after that, I think at 18 they’re old enough to decide for themselves what is right. If they decide to work for a living, go to college or uni, do an apprecticeship or something vocational, as long as they’re happy and (hopefully) doing something constructive (as opposed to sitting about on the dole!), then let them.
I don’t have a uni degree, but I have vocational qualifications coming out of my ears. I hate all this cr*p of “You need a degree to be successful!”. Surely it depends on what your definition of successful is? (You’ll have the excuse the language, I have lived my whole adult life with my dad telling me ‘Get a degree get a degree get a degree you’re wasting your life and intelligence get a degree”. Can you tell? :D )
I don’t really have any specifically educational aspirations for my children. I suppose my general aspirations in life for them are that they find their passions, do what they love, enjoy learning for its own sake their whole lives, and are confident enough to be able to learn to do whatever they need or want to do at whatever age or stage of their lives that may be.
I’d love her to be academically inclined but she isn’t interested one bit. She has a great brain, but no intention of applying it to school work at the moment…. My ‘goal’ is that she is happy and content in her life and lives a life of integrity and fulfilment, whether that’s as a lawyer or a road sweeper
But to be honest, my feeling is that with the way things are going in the world, I’d rather my DD could grow her own food, cook it, make things, build a house and be self sufficient.
I want them to be happy. There is nothing worse than waking up and dreading the day ahead. My hopes are that my children will firstly develop into confident and happy individuals and that they work towards getting the skills they need for whatever it is they want to do. I am a firm believer than education doesn’t end when a child leaves school and that you can (and should) keep learning throughout life. Sometimes you need a bit of life-experience to guide you towards your niche in life. That’s how it’s worked with me anyway.
Whatever makes her happy. I’d like to see her love of learning continue through childhood, through adulthood, through life ...
I believe life skills to be important and practical things too like growing food, cooking, making things, repairing things - so things like sewing and knitting/weaving, etc; practical skills like building things, woodwork, etc. As starchild says about being able to achieve a level of self sufficiency.
I’d just like to see her have the confidence to follow her dreams and be happy. I’ll support her in whatever way I can to achieve whatever she wants to do in life. I do love that 5 (nearly 6 as she likes to tell me!) year old mind of what she wants to do when she is older.
Eden, I was cheeky and asked you for yours without giving away mine. Partly because I was writing a letter to the school and wanted to see if I was in cloud cuckooland or if others shared my POV. For me WW summed it up very eloquently .....
Wonderwoman - 11 July 2011 10:44 PM
Being happy. Screw ‘educational aspirations’.
But what I wrote was this “What I hope the children gain from school is that it allows them to discover their passion’s, what drives them to learn, their strengths. This does not necessarily have to be academic strengths which allow them to go on to study at university. I think that it is our job as parents and teachers to kindle the flames, to give them the skills and confidence to know that they can do ANYTHING they set their mind to.”
But what I wrote was this “What I hope the children gain from school is that it allows them to discover their passion’s, what drives them to learn, their strengths. This does not necessarily have to be academic strengths which allow them to go on to study at university. I think that it is our job as parents and teachers to kindle the flames, to give them the skills and confidence to know that they can do ANYTHING they set their mind to.”
I have never used my degree career/jobwise, but I adored studying for it, it was an experience that is nothing like anything else and perhaps one day I’ll do another just for the fun of it.
Regarding Rye, I’ve not really thought about it; afterall it’s such a long time in the future. My hope through home education is simply that Rye will have a lifelong passion for learning and be inquisitive. My job, as I see it is, is simply to help him develop the skills and tools he needs to be able to do whatever he wants. At the end of the day his aspirations are far, far more important than mine.
My “educational” aspirations for our kids other than having a love of learning, knowing the basics reading, writing, cooking, growing own food etc and having the confidence to try their hand at whatever they’re interested in.
And ideally be able to do something with that so they can support themselves.
Going to agree wholeheartedly with Dormouse and go against the trend I’m afraid! I want my kids to develop a passion for learning and their own ambitions, because I think that is the most vital thing, without those there is no hope of success - how can you be succesful when you can’t define what success would be for you? DH and I both decided early on we would work hard to send our boys to a local private school, as round here, the only decent high school are catholic, which we will not send them to. plus I went to private school and Dh went to a state school and I had many more opportunities in choosing what i could learn about, and instruments to learn, sports, school trips, than he did. I will drive my kids to get good grades yes, because I agree at 15/16 you have no idea what you want to do. I didn’t, but now I do, and low grades have been affecting my chances in that area, and I don’t want them to be limited in something they want to do as adults cause as kids they didn’t understand the importance of what they were expected to do. I think regarding university, it is very important. Dh is self-made, has years of running successful businesses yet hasn’t been able to get a single job interview and feedback has basically told us it is because he doesn’t have the right qualifications. On the other hand, I did uni at 19 and at 25, and i worked harder and enjoyed and appreciated the second one much more. I think I would encourage my kids to take at least a year or two out, to travel and work in the real world so they had more of an idea what a degree is worth and not to waste their time at university. Unless they had an exceptional alternative I would expect them to do a degree. As for careers, yes i do want them to be happy, I just do’t want them to end up stuck with something they didn’t want because they didn’t work hard enough before. I hopefully will teach them to cook, clean, grow their own food and manage their own money, and I think that is all I can do. If they honestly choose any career they want, whether it be well paid or not, they will hopfeully realise the rammifications of that choice and not have flase expectations and nasty surprises down the way.
Thankyou for the link it made interesting reading. This bit
‘He argues that the best jobs and salaries will still tend to go to those who enjoyed the most social and financial support before they went to university, and that higher education is not the only means of achieving well-being.’
gives me a lot to think about, although it doesnt describe what ‘best jobs’ means. I wonder what I am doing/ not doing now that could impact on dds long term future. I doubt that ‘anything is possible’ but perhaps I am just negative round this issue.
Im interested in understanding the shape of society and the concept of social mobility. My mum feels that her greatest acheivement in life is going from woring class to middle class and she always had high aspirations for me and my brother and wanted us to continue the climb up the social ladder. My mum desperately wanted me to study medicine, I expect because she had wanted to study medicine but not gone on to, I went for something very different after having a breakdown half way through my alevels and being way off my expected grades, but I do find myself hoping my dd will do law or medicine or something that leads to a fulfilling career that pays well. I suppose because I wish I had reached the aspiratons that people had for me. I have to keep reminding myself that its what she wants to do that is the most important thing, not what I didnt manage to do. I dont understand why this seems such a big issue for me that I cant quite drop. I do think education is not the be all and end all, I had very little family support growing up and I expect that played a big role despite my doing well at school.
I do think class impacts on my aspirations, it certainly gives me a lot to think about and question, but the way in which my parents generation could work their way up and make enough to secure their retirement through property is not possible anymore, which may well be a good thing. I think the changing social and economic climate makes planning for a secure future difficult.
Does anyone else feel that their parents aspirations for them have shaped the aspirations they have for their children?
I think education/qualifications are overrated unless necessary for the career. I was the brightest kid in my year at school, I was constantly pushed into doing things that didn’t interest me. I finished school with 10 GCSEs (6 x A*, 4 x A), but I spent a few weeks leading up to GCSEs quite physically ill from all the pressure. I did my A Levels (Maths, Physics, and Art) because I was more-or-less told I had to, even though I just wanted to do a more practical, vocational art course. I used to go home at lunch time, turn my Playstation on and not bother going back for my afternoon classes because it wasn’t what I wanted to do. I still got good enough grades to get into University where I did my Art & Design foundation year, then I did the first year of a Fashion (design, styling and photography) Degree. I didn’t do brilliantly, but how can you mark creative degree work? I was no good at essays, I usually understand a subject but I can’t explain my thoughts in words. The projects were all marked to a set of criteria, you couldnt just have an idea, you had to back it up with detailed research which had to be presented in a sketchbook to a very high standard (my handwriting wasn’t good enough to annotate images I used for research so I had to type up notes). A lot of it was down to the tutor’s personal opinions too. Again, it wasn’t what I wanted to do. I wanted to do something creative, I was interested in art, fashion, photography, but the course wasn’t about doing what you enjoy, it was about getting a degree. If it was something I needed a degree in, then fair enough, but I always wanted to work freelance so I didn’t need a degree. So I dropped out, rented a little room in a dusty old mill, and bought some photography equipment. I contacted wannabe models and did photoshoots on a time-for-pictures basis (ie no-one was paid but we all got images to use in our portfolios). I also did an evening course in Make-Up for Photography (something you do need a qualification in to obtain proof of Health and Safety training when dealing with chemicals and skin), so then I could work with other photographers. My work improved and I started doing shoots with local agency models. Unfortunately though, I was already in debt from University when I started building my portfolio on my own, and my partner-at-the-time was sponging off me. I was working nearly full time hours in retail, but I didn’t have any spare cash to upgrade my equipment to persue paid work. But I learned far more just following my own path than I would have done at uni, and I was able to develop without being molded. I had a break from it for a while as my studio became a storage room when I moved onto my boat. But now that I’m going to be a SAHM, I plan to start finding my creative path. I’m going to be more financially stable and I believe I’m mature enough now to make my own decisions. I still have my dad asking me when I’m going back to University. He says I’m stubborn. Yet he’s too stubborn to listen to and accept why I don’t want to go to university.
I’m not going to push my daughter to get the best grades in stuff she doesn’t want to do just in case she needs them in the future because I think that would make her unhappy. If she’s not ready to learn something, why make her. If she’s good at maths but wants to do art, I’ll let her do art, she can always pick maths up again. My sister didn’t do well at school and didn’t pass her maths GCSE. Now that she’s ready to do maths at that level she’s doing an evening course in it, so it hasn’t stopped her. If my daughter wants to be a lawyer or doctor obviously I’ll support her through university. If she wants to do something where a degree isn’t essential, we’ll look at all the options and I’ll give her realistic advice, but I’ll support her in what she wants to do. If she leaves school and wants to spend a few years getting to know what she wants to do, then I’d rather her do that. I don’t understand why you’re forced at 14/16/18 to decide what you want to do for the rest of your life.
I think, more than anything, I want them to be happy. But I think this is a complex one. I followed my dreams and studied only what I was interested in and tbh, I’m now looking at possibly returning to work and putting my kids in school and all sorts of crap, whereas had I done a degree that was less useless than Near Eastern Languages (ffs!) , and not followed that up with a qualification that only allowed me to do 9-5 jobs (law-again, ffs, me in a pinstripe suit?), I might now have considerably more options.
SO, I think in some ways what I want for my kids is enough financial common sense , awareness of the benefits of simplicity, community and delayed gratification, that they actually can get by on less money, because the less money you need (or think you need) the freer you are. I do rather think that they should speak a foreign language in order to prevent them from being those embarrassing arrogant British people abroad.
I do want and expect them to have basic skills. I expect them to become numerate, literate, able to argue their point well and concisely. I want them to have a sense of how to build community, why it is important to stand up for what they believe in, and have the confidence to realise their dreams.
Academically, I am really not that bothered. I want them to know stuff, but I don’t much care if they get grades to prove it.
No high formal education aspirations whatsoever. I will provide all I can for excellent education though, but it does not have to be formal for me to be proud of them. All I want is that any child of mine is happy. Whatever they choose to do, I will support them. In all honesty, I’d rather he turned out like Autumn’s practical brother than my very educated colleagues stuck in stressful jobs, earning good money yet still reckon they are broke.
I used to be very aspirational, and wanted to achieve the highest education possible - till I had my son. Heck, I dreamt about completing my masters degree whilst on maternity leave and going back to work ready to get my Ph.D. started. Oh, how that has changed! Changes even more with every visit to work or get together I attend. I recently attended a retirement tea party for a colleague. Of the 30 odd colleagues I saw, not one answered positively to my question, ‘how’s work?’. All were stressed, 3 on anti depressants due to work, and 2 just recently came back from months off sick with stress, and the gossip was about a junior doc who’d stormed out of work a few days ago, unable to cope and has been signed off for 3 weeks due to stress. Yes, I work in healthcare.
Off on a tangent, I apologise, but what I’m trying to say is, I want my child happy in whatever they choose to do. Not just happy, but healthy too.
