Just out of interest, how old is Poppy?
Don’t feel bad at all, I understand how uncomfortable it can be, for me especially around family, and especially when my 19 month old is having a good old feel of the other boob as she nurses!
If it would help at all, maybe you can say to Poppy that you want her to know she can feed whenever she wants and that that was your reaction, nothing to do with her, and that you love to feed her? Although my daughter is only 19 months old, I genuinely believe that speaking to her, and in particular, apologising to her if I’ve done something I didn’t mean to, really helps. Even if she doesn’t fully get it (and I believe they get a heck of a lot more than you think, as your daughter demonstrated!) I do think they understand emotion and it might help both of you? Just a suggestion - I always feel better for it.
I used to be so embarrassed at b/feeding, so sure someone somewhere had an issue with it, but in over 18 months, in all the strange and wonderful locations I have done it in, I’ve never once had any issues. With family I feel differently, because although no one would say anything, I know some are definitely thinking, ‘My God, why are you *still* breastfeeding her?’ My MIL said to my husband once that my daughter would still be feeding when she’s 18 if I didn’t wean her soon!
What helps me is feeling like I’m a part of something much bigger than me - even if I don’t always feel comfortable, I enjoy feeling strong and confident doing it wherever the hell I like, because I genuinely believe that part of my role as a breastfeeding Mama is to be part of the social change too - even if it just raising awareness. It warms my heart to think that perhaps some little girl somewhere might see me doing it, and that image, along with any others, might stick with her, might even play a part in her decision to bf later in life.
I really love imagining that my daughter will grow up in a society that is much more informed and open-minded than the one we currently live in, where, hopefully, it will not even be an issue for her, and I know that our personal bf-ing relationship will play a big part in that. I know all that is easier said than done, but I find that if I at least act confidently, the confidence itself follows, and the less you show that you are embarrassed, the less other people will feel there is anything you should be embarrassed about!
Another thing that really helps me is I really now my facts when it comes to extended bf-ing, and if any of my family make a jokey comment, I like to remind them that not only is it doing my daughter a world of good, considering her immune system doesn’t mature til she is 6, and breastmilk is constantly adapting to suit her needs but actually, for every year I breastfeed, my chances of getting ovarian cancer or type 2 diabeties decreases. Also, thank God our ancestors didn’t wean til we were much older or none of us would be here now!
Long reply…but remember, you are doing such an awesome job, and you should feel so proud of yourself and so happy for what you have are continuing to do for and with your daughter!