It can feel terribly callous to mentally reject a gift, but there are ways of assuaging that feeling. After all, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Visit a charity shop after Christmas and you’ll quickly realise you’re not alone!
Just before Christmas, my son and I cleared out his toy box to make space for the toys he’ll receive on the big day. He’d grown out of a lot of things too, and has been blessed with incredibly generous and doting relatives so isn’t short of toys to play with. I was musing on what to do with the toys which we normally give to friends with younger children, or donate to charity. This year, I began a little research. My husband works on a project that involves women’s refuges and I was thinking about the kids that would end up with their mums in a refuge this Christmas. This time of year can be a fractious and fraught one if there are problems in the family, and many women and children will find themselves seeking safety away from the home.
Often, women and children have to flee with just the clothes they’re wearing. Children have to leave behind favourite toys; women often don’t have clean clothes, sanitary protection, or toiletries, even a toothbrush. So a box of toiletries is a real treat and a chance for some pampering. Toys and books help a child feel more settled and many refuges like to give the children Christmas presents. Different refuges have different rules on donations: some don’t accept electrical goods but many are pleased to get a wide range of items – from bric a brac to kitchenware – to help women set up in a new home. Contact your local refuge and ask them what their protocol is.
Domestic violence charities are often forgotten. In 2008, research reported by New Philanthropy Capital showed that the income of the charity Donkey Sanctuary was greater than that of the three biggest domestic violence charities combined. That’s right – the THREE biggest domestic violence charities. But this year, 750,000 children and 1.2 million women experienced domestic violence in England and Wales. Women’s refuges need funding and support to provide a safe retreat for those in danger in their own homes.
To find a refuge near you, you can visit Refuge or Women’s Aid. Googling ‘women’s refuge’ and the area you live in yields results and you can speak to someone direct about what you have to donate.