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My dd 7 is driving everyone bonkers at the moment. it's just that she doesn't stop talking. She's just busting with things to say all of the time she never halts,she thinks and taks out loud, she's always asking questions, she talks as she plays, she even talks in her sleep. I can't seem to manage a conversation with any one with out her butting in, contradicting what I'm saying or even telling me I'm wrong. She ploughs into others coversation and starts talking over the top of others and doesn't know that she's being rude. She's even started talking that much she's not listening to what others have to say.Her brain just seems to go into over drive and it all comes flooding out.

We've tried telling her nicely to wait untill others have spoken, not to talk over others, I have to remind her to watch what she's saying as she can seem to be quite rude. But i'm finding I'm starting to lose patience with her as she's overloading me with 1001 questions and anwsers and my brain goes into meltdown. 

She's very confidenand head strong pluss I do love the way she can engage and converse with anyone. I don't want to knock her confidence or to feel that she can't come to us for help, anwsers or to chat. I Just want to be able to think some times.   

I would love to know if anyone else has such a talkative child and how they manage to cope.

Lorna


 

Hi

Lol, my oldest son who is also 7 is exactly like that! he drives us mad ::) just never seems to stop. Obviously thats lovely most of the time and you can have some lovely long conversations with him….....but other times he is just endlessly wittering on (i know that sounds nasty - but i'm sure you'll know where i'm coming from!) i have to admit that quite recently we have started telling him to be quiet :-[ i just cant help it, i dont shout at him and try not to be rude just politely ask him to stop and be quiet for a little while. Mind you he doesnt seem to take offense just draws breath and starts again ;D I think mainly its just his personality, he has a *very* busy mind and at this age he cant seem to help but vocalise all his thoughts, i can kind understand as i talk a lot myself and often have to remind myself to stop!

I can totally understand how it makes you feel like you have brain overload as we often feel exactly the same, unfortunately no good tips on managing it but personally (and you may totally disagree with me!) I wouldnt feel too bad if you have to ask her to have some quiet time without talking occasionally as to me this sounds like a fairly reasonable request smile

Lucy

We have had a similar situation with DS1, who can get quite obsessive about his current interest (yu-Gi-Oh cards, WarHammer, etc) and will talk at you about minute details and nuances of the game for what seems like hours!  I can find I switch off and put in appropriate utterances every now and again, and at the end of it I'm nonr the wiser, but he has got whatever it was off his chest.  I know it sounds awful, buit sometimes this is the only way, because if you tell him to stop, he just carries on regardless!

As far as interrupting goes, I don't think it is unreasonable to ask her to wait for an appropriate break in the conversation, it's what everyone else has to do!  The boys seem to think the best time to talk to me is when I'm on the phone, but they have to wait, even when they start gesturing / signing to me!

:( Frankly , I tell my daughter to shut up. :(

It's so not a likeable trait and NO ONE likes it in the entire universe (she says being incredibly judgmental), so it's better I tell her now to shut up than she hears it from someone else.

I say things like 'I love hearing what you have to say, but right now I need to concentrate. Could you give me ten minutes'. And I expect her to go off and play <sound of cracking whip>
I've always been very upfront with her and will tell her when I think she is babbling on about incessant trivialities. When she wants to talk sensible stuff then I am all ears and will, of course chat with her.

The questions bug me too. Ok, it's a sign of an intelligent child so they say, but actually I wonder how obsessive it is too. My daughter likes to be the centre of attention and questions like 'Do you think red, yellow or blue is my favourite colour?' and 'which fairy do you think is the oldest - pink fairy, baby fairy, beautiful fairy, jealous fairy, umbrella fairy or oldest fairy' (and of course, the answer is NOT oldest fairy  ::)) just doesn't interest me - I don't give a damn and I get this sort of thing ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLll day long.

Perhaps she is insecure, I don't know, but I'm afraid this is where I earn my 'Failed Mother' badge as it's the thing that really pushes my buttons.

I am so quiet, insular and reflective, so it holds up a big mirror to me which I am uncomfortable with. It also reminds me of my Mother and as I am right at the peak of working through my 'mother issues' right now with a therapist it is even worse at the moment :(

My poor dd; whatever will she grow up to think of me…............. I actually tell her to save those conversations for when she sees Grandma - how is that for a confession??

Am I a bully?  :-\

We have worked out a signal for 'no talking'; which she choose herself. If she comes up to me and dh when we are talking (and don't they do that - they just don't seem to notice that there is a conversation taking place already or the words just FALL out of their mouths without them knowing about it). Anyway, she has asked me to put up my hand - she's quite a visual person, so that helps to remind her. The thing that REALLY gets to me if dh and I are talking is that she will cut across me when I have gone silent or taken a deep breath to answer. Grrrrrrr.

Starchild x

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Thank you so much much for your anwsers, I know now I not the only one, which makes me feel so much better.

[quoteauthor=starchild link=topic=1692.msg17999#msg17999 date=1212734120

The questions bug me too. Ok, it's a sign of an intelligent child so they say, but actually I wonder how obsessive it is too. My daughter likes to be the centre of attention and questions like 'Do you think red, yellow or blue is my favourite colour?' and 'which fairy do you think is the oldest - pink fairy, baby fairy, beautiful fairy, jealous fairy, umbrella fairy or oldest fairy' (and of course, the answer is NOT oldest fairy  ::)) just doesn't interest me - I don't give a damn and I get this sort of thing ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLll day long.

Starchild thanks for being so honest.
She sounds just the same as my daughter. I so now how you feel. I sometimes  just want to lie on the floor and shut enough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I don't think your being a bully at all, I know how hard it can be to function with this sort of assult on your hearing, I don't cope well with lots different input, I get completley over run and go into meltdown. And I agree with Queenie that it's ok to want to have some solitude, we all need time to gather our thoughts and let our mind relax.

Love Lorna xx


Both of mine do this - I have DD going on at me in one ear, DS in the other, both about different things and I'm supposed to be following both conversations and responding appropriately to each of them, and in the end I just have to escape for while. Sometimes I threaten to sit with headphones on if they won;t be quiet for a minute
We haven't managed to get them stop butting in when other people are talking either though we have taught them to say 'can you take a pause  please?' if they ahve something they're desperate to say. That just ends up though with me and DH trying to talk to each other and both children bellowing 'take a pause please!' at the tops of their voicxes at us. Drives me potty.

Liz grin x

Druid, boat-dwelling, home educating mum of DD1 (11), Aspie DS (9) and baby DD2 (2), & part-time step-mum to 2 stepdaughters, 9 and 7.

My daughter who is 13 seems to have a super highway between brain and mouth - whatever comes into her head is out of her mouth a milisecond later whether it makes sense or not.  Mainly I can ignore it or just the occasional mmm or aha is all she needs, but sometimes I have to tell her that you don't have to talk constantly, being quiet or reflective is Ok too.  I tend to get an incomprehending look followed by whatever new torrent of nothing is falling out of her mouth  ;D

Mind you, I can recall being identical at that age.   wink

Becky
xx

Mummy to four little ones

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