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In the last few months (really since she turned 6 in february) dd1 has been getting more and more stroppy, cheeky, being rude to her sisters and dh and me, and just down right a complete handful, that I am struggling to cope with. I’m finding it very hard to keep my patience (and often don’t) and to practice gentle parenting. I’m finding an impulse to be childish right back to her, or to want to impose conditions on activities, which is really not the sort of parenting I want to do. It doesn’t help that I’m reading unconditional parenting at the moment, and it feels like everytime I open my mouth to deal with an issue, the opposite of an unconditional response comes out :(  Is this normal six year old behaviour, or am I missing some sort of trigger thats causing it. I’m really struggling to enjoy parenting her recently :( Any thoughts or tips on handling ths would be very appreciated but please be gentle with me.

Mummy to 4 little pixies: Seren (feb 08), Merri (may 09), Nerys (june 11) & Lyra (April 13) My sister’s amazing bead shop

I don’t know, they go through phases, they come out the other end, we are tested….....we fail in our parenting at times, we grow in our parenting too though:) I always look at the bigger picture of our life when things get tough ......‘what am I missing?’........are their needs being met/is life just too hectic and they can’t cope/are they being properly stimulated/are they getting positive interactions/am I tired and therefore my view of them is unclear…...etc

My almost 7 year old son is really testing me atm!!! Oh my goodness, he has always been the ‘easy’ one, but he is so exhausting right now & my patience is sooooo stretched! Recently I have been asking DH for more help at w/ends and evenings, just to give me a little break from him. At the same time Ive been trying to build in lots of positive time with DS too, as I don’t want him to feel pushed out. He is soooooo boisterous and actually quite rude and really OCD! I do remember DD was difficult at a similar age (but not the OCD, that’s just DS!), it went on for ages but we got through that…......I will get through this with DS. I feel pushed to my limits at times with him atm. You are not alone…..I know that doesn’t help :D

Try to find a little time for yourself. Talk to your child and try to find out whats going on, how they feel etc. Review what you’re doing, do you need to make changes? xxx

Sorry gotta go!!!!!!

To dare is to lose ones footing temporarily, to not dare is to lose oneself.

LETS number 137

Don’t know about 6 year olds but my 5 year old is hard work right now and I’m really struggling to practice gentle parenting too.  We are struggling with her hearing but she is also ignoring us when she doesn’t want to hear something.

I’m hoping this phase will flow through soon.  I’m trying to really seize the good times and treasure them. This evening we connected over teeth cleaning.  And we connected when we planting seeds.  But also had many many meltdowns and shouting at me that she never ever gets to do anything she wants to do or spend time with her friends. 

I’m hoping by just keeping acknowledging her frustrations, talking through them when she is calm and making sure that life has some choices will get us through this stage.  Hope your stage passes soon!

Thanks for the replies. I think I need to just slow down and concentrate on her a bit more. Picnicinthewoods - I think you’re spot on - life is hectic at the moment (mid house renovation), coupled with the fact we have just started to recover from nearly two months of one after the other illness, leaving us rarely getting out to see friends. I think we are just too cooped up and surrounded by building clutter. Thanks for reminding me to step back and see the bigger picture. smile  Now if I could just find that elusive reserve of extra patience….

Mummy to 4 little pixies: Seren (feb 08), Merri (may 09), Nerys (june 11) & Lyra (April 13) My sister’s amazing bead shop

Do a forum search on here for 7 years olds and you will soon see you are not alone…huge hormonal surge coupled with shift from first to second phase of childhood and BOOM !!  Hugs

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