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...I have to tell *someone*, we’re expecting our second child at the end of Sept.
It was a bit of a surprise but I’m so happy. It’ll be quite a different experience, especially living in India now but I’m in a good, strong place in my life compared to last time and life here is wholesome, green and smiling.
My son will be almost 6 when this one is born so I wondered if those of you with larger age gaps between children could offer any advice or share experiences. My son is a high energy spirited child and now at 5.5 is calming and becoming more aware of himself and his effect on his surroundings and other people so I feel he’s at a good age to be a big brother. I am all to aware, however, that 6 years is a big gap and they may not be close in the way me and my sister were with a gap of 2 years.
Anyway, rambling now, it’s later here…well…8.30pm…not late really but you know. Been so tired these past weeks *yawn*.
Look forward to being a bit more active here, seems so quiet!
With love, Laura.
Congratulations!! Wonderful news! I hope you’ll have a good pregnancy. No advice re age gaps I’m afraid, but I’m sure others here can help.
(Lets number 63)
Congratulations and blessings! x
Trying to do everything - failing madly!
Being constantly & lovingly educated by daughter Freya, 19
Congratulations, lovely news xx
Home Eding Mama of 2 gorgeous boys! Trying to live magically on this wild and crazy earth.
Congratulations Just wanted to say that we have 3 1/2 years between my two, and my daughter was at a very self centred and demanding stage when her brother was due so I was really worried about jealousy etc (suffered myself as the family baby with jealous older sister) - we involved her a lot, and gave her responsibilities, little brother gave her a gift on her arrival, we made a big deal of the arrival changing her into a BIG sister etc ... my fears were absolutely groundless, she has loved him all the way, couldn’t wait for him to come into her bedroom (took 2 1/2 years!), they play together, they do fight as all siblings will, but really we have been amazingly lucky - they really do just love each other and its a joy to see. We were on the way to school yesterday to fetch S from school and E said, “are we collecting S?”, “yes” I said, and he said “my favourite!”.
The other thing I’ve done is “let her” feel jealous sometimes, I’ve put a name to her feeling, and I’ve told her that I understand and remember how that felt as a child but that really in the end feeling jealous only hurts the person feeling it. S is amazing though, she is 6 now, nearly 7 and her spirit just fills the whole house!
So, whilst you do have a bigger gap, I think putting thought into it now can really help, and it can work out beautifully.
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Wow! Congratulations!! We have 2.5yrs between my first two but 7yrs between 2nd and 3rd and if I knew then what I knew now I would have left that gap between all of them. The 2.5yrs was REALLY tough and I struggled a lot. Despite having 3 now, i found it SO much easier having a newborn/toddler with older children as siblings and my older ones adore my youngest much more than they adore each other!! We’ve had super close times with the two older ones but being that close we’ve had a LOT of arguments. My older two wouldn’t dream of arguing with my nearly 3yr old (they’re now 12, nearly 10 and nearly 3) and my 3yr old is the baby and they look after him rather than treat him as an equal sibling and I totally love it. Obviously the relationships are very different to how my big two were and there are a lot of plus points to having them close together - but for me personally, it meant I could totally enjoy my 3rd where as I felt I missed out on my 2nd (and him on me too) because I had a toddler in tow.
Lots of love x x x x
mummy to dd(15), ds1(12) and ds2 (5)
LETS number 144
Congratulations!! Wonderful news !! ????
Unschooling Mama to River (7), Rain (4) and Blossom (2) xx
Many congratulations I hope you enjoy your pregnancy
I have four and half years between my children, I would say like all ‘gaps’ it has its pros and cons. The pros for me were that my eldest was capable of doing a fair bit for himself, he enjoyed helping to look after his little sister when she was a baby and is still immensely protective of her. It was easier to explain to him about the demands of a baby and how I could and would make time to do things with him but baby had to come first, whilst he may not have liked that he did seem to understand it and be ok with it.
The cons were that I was worried after so long being the only child he would be resentful of the time needed for looking a baby that was no longer his exclusively. It needs careful managing but you can do it! I had also given away a lot of the baby stuff as I didn’t think a second child was going to join us but that is easy enough to sort out!
Your worry about them not being friends is possible with all siblings regardless of the age gap. My children are now 10 ds and 5.5 dd and they are the best of friends. They don’t play together all the time and I wouldn’t expect them to, but when they do they get along really well. It takes a while for them to really play as equals but then it does with all children.
I had wanted to have children with a closer age gap, but I wouldn’t change the gap I have for anything knowing what I know now
I wouldn’t be worried about the age gap, there are going to be pro’s and con’s whether gaps are small or big. My two are 14 months apart and I feel I didn’t really get to enjoy either my son as a baby or my daughter as a toddler, it was just hectic all the time. They are very close though, but I do think that is in part due to how you raise them rather than the age gap issue. Also there is nearly 7 years between me and my youngest sister and I adored her growing up & we are very close now as adults. There is less competition too with that kind of age gap. Enjoy xxx many congratulations xxx
To dare is to lose ones footing temporarily, to not dare is to lose oneself.
LETS number 137
Congratulations!! There are 6 years between my two, and it’s great. At first DD was a bit jealous (for, like, a week), but now they are totally inseparable. DD is old enough now to dress herself, etc so I don’t have the stress of dressing two younger children on a morning, and she does so much to help. She loves being a big sister, and DS loves her to pieces. DS is still just a baby, at 10 months old but for now it is lovely to watch them together. Just as long as he doesn’t touch her bunny!!
Mamma to Hannah, age 8 and Jonas, 2
We told our boy at the weekend and he seems quite happy to be a big brother. MIL seems less keen but oh well…
I love the idea of letting him come to the scans and let him be as involved as he wants to be. I am toying with the idea of having him at the birth - anyone have their children present at subsequent births? Can it work? Or is it a bit of a scary time for a kid do you think?
Thanks again for the well wishes.
With love, Laura.
Congratulations!What fabulous news.!!!I have a 7 year gap between no3 and 4 and it works well.She (no3) still plays beautifuly with smallest and there is the added bonus of her being responsible so can easily leave them in a room playing together and know they are fine.No experience of having other siblings at the births but I know friends who have and it has worked.A personal decission,I suppose.xx
Mummy to 4