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Hi All,

It’s been a very long time since I was last here, and I’m actually posting on behalf of my sister.

My sister is expecting her first baby, and is now 12 days “overdue” and not sure how to go. She is not at all alternative in lifestyle, but on my recommendation has gone with an IM, a decision I think she’s been really happy with. There was a bit of confusion with dates, she made it Oct 16th, but after scans her due date was moved to Oct 8th. She had another scan this afternoon and they reckoned the baby was just over 8lbs, so she is thinking that the hospital dates are probably right (neither our side of the family nor her dh’s have big babies, we/they were all 6/7 pounders). They said the placenta was looking in good condition and all was fine with the baby, and as her IM was with her there was no mention at this stage of induction. She hasn’t had any noticeable contractions, and says she isn’t feeling any different in herself to the last couple of months of the pregnancy.

She has a home water birth planned, and is getting a bit anxious that if things don’t start happening soon she is going to end up on a slippery slope of interventions and having a very different birth to the one they hope for. And obviously, she is feeling very ready to meet their baby! Her midwife is being very hands-off and not offering advice, but I think she could really do with a bit more support. I’ve suggested she has a chat with her midwife and explain her concerns, I just wondered if anyone here had any words of wisdom that I could pass on? She hasn’t been able to find much info on going past 42 weeks, so feels like that is a bit of a point of no return!

I didn’t want to read and run as it’s such a tough situation, but I don’t know that anyone can make the decision except your sister. What was her original date based on, though? Just some thoughts:
1) Estimates of the baby’s weight are notoriously unreliable (just poke around even on this forum and you’ll see lots of stories of mothers being told they were expecting huge babies who turned out to be medium-sized after all); 2) even if the baby weighs 8 lbs and is larger than his parents were at birth, that’s not necessarily a reason to assume hospital dates are correct. All sorts of other factors (including random chance) might make a baby bigger than his parents/ancestors were.

That said, I am truly not sure what I would do in her situation. I would want to keep monitoring very closely, and to take into account the general risk level of the pregnancy (is it an otherwise low-risk pregnancy?). I know I may be in the minority here for even wanting to use the word “risk” or to argue that *some* fears are warranted/rational, but for personal reasons of my own (not my own experiences but those of close friends), I would worry about going past 42 weeks (if the hospital dates are correct, which is why I asked what your sister based her original date on, and how sure she was of that date before the hospital doubted it).

I had an Independent Midwife for my second child, and I think with some things—with the biggest decisions—they do have to be sort of hands-off because they can’t take responsibility for the decision. That was really hard for me; I was also looking for a friend, someone who would be warm and motherly and just tell me what to do, but unfortunately that’s not what they’re there for :-( . I hope your sister finds a source of support somewhere!

Ahh how exciting. I went over with all three of my babies and was induced with all. I live an hour away from a hospital or birthing centre so I felt that it was better for us to be induced rather than monitoring daily. Anyway, as is often the case, my first birth was not fantastic with the drip and an epidural and all sorts. I did not feel in control. However with my second two I just had the pessary and they broke my waters and then labour started on its own and had two relatively natural births with gas and air. I think what im trying to say is that even if your sister does have to be induced its not the end of the world and you can entirely refuse the oxytocin drip and be in complete control,  (well, you and baba!)
I really hope your sis goes into labour without intervention but induction isn’t that bad!

And now mama to William too!

I know several friends who all went 10+ over and had acupuncture…all went into natural labour within 48hrs had normal intervention free and natural births..get out the pins!!!!

Thanks so much, I really appreciate people taking the time to answer smile

As it happens, my sister got a call this morning from her consultant saying he’d reviewed her latest scan and wanted to see her. The upshot is that she is going into hospital at 8am tomorrow to be induced, so the home birth is off the cards. Her midwife reckons it’ll be Friday before she actually has the baby as her body is showing no signs of being ready yet. I’m feeling a bit sad for her but will stay positive and hope it’s still the best experience possible in the circumstances.

Thanks again!

greeneve - 21 October 2015 04:39 PM

I know several friends who all went 10+ over and had acupuncture…all went into natural labour within 48hrs had normal intervention free and natural births..get out the pins!!!!

Same happened with my first; had acupuncture at 41+4 weeks and she was born late the next day.

Best of luck to your sister anyway! Perhaps she’s had the baby by now? My SIL had 2 inductions—she was living in the Netherlands where home birth is the norm, but even there they won’t do a home birth past if you’re more than 10 days overdue. But both her inductions ended in otherwise natural, drug-free births, so I hope that will be/was the case for your sister too grin .

I was hoping for a natural hospital birth first time.  But baby didn’t come and my dates made baby 16-20 days overdue (scan had me 13 days over).  Induction was the best idea.  There were no signs of labour, there was nothing happening.

My second baby got to 13 days and I went into natural labour.  My body did what it needed to do.

This time I’ve talked to the midwifery team and I’m going to be monitored from 14 days if needed.  Hoping for a home birth.  But if monitoring shows that there are any problems, I’ll be induced.  Babies need helping sometimes.

I hope you have good news for us, Scout! Hope your sister got the birth she wanted despite being induced, but most of all I hope she is snuggled up at home with a healthy baby by now grin .

preets - 26 October 2015 11:48 PM

I hope you have good news for us, Scout! Hope your sister got the birth she wanted despite being induced, but most of all I hope she is snuggled up at home with a healthy baby by now grin .

Thanks preets! smile The good news is that yes, my sister is fine and now has a lovely healthy baby boy; the less good news is that she ended up with an emergency c-section! My sister is totally fine with it though, doesn’t feel like she went through a traumatic experience at all (though it sounds like one to me!) so I’m happy she’s happy! Her lovely IM has suggested they have a “rebirth” and use the birthing pool that didn’t get used at the time, so I think they are going to do that. I have a gorgeous new nephew who weighed in at 8lbs 1oz, so the hospital was right about that, and she’s already talking about the next one!!!

Thanks for the advice everyone!

Proud Auntie Scout :D

Lovely news - congratulations to you all grin xx

I am so pleased! If your sister is happy and the baby is healthy, nothing else matters. Some women grieve not having a natural birth and some women don’t; neither position is “right” or “wrong,” they’re just different perspectives from different people grin .

Enjoy your new little nephew! Babies are just the best, yum yum, snuffle up that baby smell as much as you can!

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