Parenting

We’ve all heard the admonitions that screen-time is responsible for a huge proportion of society’s ills, from obesity to a lack of interest in the natural world. But our children live in the 21st century and inherent in that is the fact we live technology-based lives. If we limit our children’s screen time, are they missing out on the life their peers take for granted? Are we holding them back from cultural and social experiences? In terms of television, research seems to indicate the answer is no.

Popular perception of swearing suggests that more than half of people consider it to be offensive and even more feel that it is something children should be protected from. This is partly the reason for the censorship of daytime television shows and broadcasts and the official “watershed”. Family viewing is considered cleaner and more wholesome when swearing is actively avoided. The BBC, in particular, go to great lengths to achieve this with notorious hard-man Phil Mitchell oft heard bellowing such atrocities as “You flipping sponge!”. But, is it really necessary and why are people so afraid of swearing around children?

It’s a minefield out there. We’ve all been in a situation where an innocent comment about a parenting decision we’ve made had the same effect as letting off a stink-bomb in polite company. Many of us who make parenting choices slightly left of the mainstream might decide it’s preferable not to mention them at all. Parenting is an emotive subject and almost all parents are familiar with the low-level guilt that seems to haunt even the most simple of parental choices.

We all hope to raise children who are aware of others and the world around them. Children are drawn to the natural world, a biological tendency called biophillia. We’ve all seen the way in which children, unhindered by adult influence, will naturally run towards animals. But if we do not offer opportunities for this innate sense to develop, children can develop a fear of nature, known as biophobia. These children are afraid or contemptuous of nature and natural surroundings, and often avoid animals.

I’m sitting typing this in the warm peace of our local library. It’s a place that has a special place in my heart, as all libraries do. Every time I enter a library I still feel the thrill of the fact these amazing places are gloriously, deliciously free. That these great bastions of learning are available to all, regardless of age, economic background or religious leaning. Libraries have something for everyone.

Stories form the backbone of our lives. They integrate our understanding of self, of where we fit in the grand scheme of things. Through stories, we come to understand the lives of our ancestors in the form of history, and the social mores of the culture around us. Stories are a vital part of a child’s learning experience; from the earliest stage they begin to form sounds through storytelling. As they grow, stories teach children empathy, language skills, emotional intelligence, connection, reflection and resolution, amongst a whole gamut of other things.

We all know at least one. You know, the parent with the exceptionally gifted child. Everything said child does is amazing, indicates unparalleled genius and leaves us occasionally wondering if our own parenting is up to scratch or if maybe our children are even a little behind below average developmentally. If you’re lucky, that is. Most of us know about ten… thousand. Everyone’s child is a genius, these days. Such is the reality of everyday motherhood. It’s a little bit boring, and a whole lot crazy-difficult, so the bragging naturally ensues.

Always wanted to try acupuncture but never been sure if you’ll like it? You’re not alone; lots of people who fear needles think that acupuncture seems like a good thing but they’re rather nervous to try it themselves. My partner is one of those people and several years ago, he bit the bullet and decided to give acupuncture a try – he was pleasantly surprised! The needles were far less intimidating than he’d anticipated and he found the experience not only painless but incredibly relaxing. Within a few treatments, he was a convert and when he moved offices, rather than give up on his weekly lunchtime treatment, he sought out a new acupuncturist nearby.

Almost all of our lives will be touched by self-harm – or self-injury as it is sometimes known. Either we’ll have a friend or family member who struggles with self-harm, or we will have experienced it ourselves. Or perhaps we simply remember someone at school whose scars broke our heart. Self-harm has often been rather derisively painted by the media as teenage angst and it is still a very taboo subject in our society. That’s why events such as Self Injury Awareness Day (SIAD), taking place on 1st March, are so important.

Despite the cultural stereotype, guilt actually does serve a purpose. It lets us know when we’ve made a mistake; it encourages us to better ourselves, to try harder and to attempt to make amends with a person or situation. It keeps us working on our relationships and is a normal, healthy emotion that we must accept and process in the most positive way we can – whether it’s a simple apology or completely re-evaluating certain beliefs and behaviours. But what happens when we can’t let go of the guilt, or there’s nobody left to make amends with?