We spoke to Carolyn about her book Breathing For Pregnancy; much more than a handbook, it’s a lyrical journey through pregnancy and beyond that's not afraid to discuss the tougher aspects of carrying a child, while giving kind, practical, optimistic support
Can you tell us a little about your background?
“I used to work in the film industry, but in the 90s became a portrait photographer. I was fascinated by the archetypes and iconography of pregnancy. I was told I’d never have children, but I got sober, I met my husband and got married, then I discovered I was pregnant. I had a miscarriage at an airport in India which was not a pleasant experience, but that led me to train as a doula, and an active birth teacher.
Along with two midwives, I started The Mother’s Journey; pregnancy yoga training and teaching. I then became a psychotherapist specialising in trauma and addiction anxiety. I’ve always held a place in my heart for pregnant women and what we go through. I’ve been a single parent for 13 years.”
Your book is unflinching and addresses some of the anxieties pregnant women might have. Was that intentional from the beginning of the writing process?
“Yes. I have two children, and had multiple pregnancies. It’s a funny thing, writing a book that addresses 81% of the population (those who are parents), yet no-one is really talking about what those people go through. On a religious, cultural and social level, we just have to get on with it because it’s our job.”
How did you begin your breathwork practice?
“I was in India and a yoga teacher climbed into my truck! She came back to London and started a class in my house. I hated it. But bit by bit I tried it and found it was changing me. It involved an enormous amount of breathwork, which I used during my first successful pregnancy. As an ex drug addict and alcoholic, my brain never liked meditation, it wasn’t good at being still, but breathwork just takes you there. It’s a very powerful and under-estimated alternative.”
How does breathwork fit with yoga?
“If you go to a normal yoga class, you expect to be relaxed at the end. But I teach that your body needs to be relaxed before you start the posture, because postures are magical. Just three minutes of breathwork will completely transform your system back to neutral.”
“Just three minutes of breathwork will completely transform your system back to neutral”
Can you start it at any point in your pregnancy?
“I’ve seen women coming to yoga at 42 weeks pregnant for that last class! And tests are so good, that women also know early on that they’re pregnant. You can start at any point; at six months, or because you’ve had a bad scan. My intention was always that the book carried you through to the other side. Through the fourth trimester, which I extend.”
And you advocate others around you should try out breathwork too
“Anyone can do this. There are so many ways in which you can breathe, and every single one of those breaths will have a different effect. Over time you fall in love with the breath because of how it makes you feel. You know that it’s your friend. I wanted to give readers a sense of agency, that they can change how they feel, even if it’s only for five minutes. I include a personal mantra in my book, ‘Step away, beautiful person, and give yourself and everyone around you a break.’”
Is there one breath you’d recommend to people to try first?
“There’s a breath to manage the mind. You inhale through your mouth, then exhale totally silently through your nose. That, for me, is a go-to breath. It all goes quiet, you release your stress system. Everything stops, your mind stops and body functions optimally. And you can do that for yourself.”
Yes; the thread that this is universal, accessible and low-cost runs through the book.
“Yes. You can do it on the bus. On the tube. Or go to the bathroom. In an ideal world you will sit beautifully and make it a very sacred breath, but, for example, the breath above; no-one needs to know you’re doing it. And when your kids see you doing it, they want to do it too. They love how you change because you do it. You become a safer person to be with. When the parent starts to change, to regulate, so do the children.”
You run online breathwork classes…
“I run a class at 6am every Monday, and over time, thousands of people have joined and done it. I come online, we stretch, then I teach four breaths over half an hour. All these people, breathing together. It’s amazing.”
You describe your incredible births, how you loved labour and the entire process.
“Yes. The breaths in the book are not for actual birth, because the midwives or doulas will take you through a different process and I don’t teach hypnobirthing. But you’ll be good enough at breath by that point to able to do those breaths easily. It will help. My son’s labour was at home, and my incredible midwives, The Albany Midwives, let me push for three hours, which is unusual. My daughter’s labour was two hours. I had a friend making peace mandalas on the floor while I gave birth. Each time I loved it. I love endorphins, and breathwork can help you trust your body and to bear the discomfort of labour. I was in such an altered state; giving birth was one of the most powerful things I’ve ever done in my life, and each time I wanted to get up and do it again!”
MORE RESOURCES
READ Breathing For Pregnancy (published by Vermilion on November 16th)
